Blatant Self Promotion

Don't know where to start off today. I can't even think of a title for this post at the moment. Hopefully I'll be inspired as I write more. My head is all over the place at the moment - I''ve still got heaps of work on and really need to be able to 'switch off' from it at night so that I return each morning feeling refreshed but there don't seem to be enough hours in the day. It has been a busy few months for Phase Creative! (There's my title!)

I had a bit of a mini internal breakdown last night. Sorry if that sounds exaggerated but its TTOM so I figure I'm entitled to a little drama. I have several irrational paranoias/fears about things and they get worse when I am home on my own. First and worst one is Spiders. I'm more afraid of spiders than anything else, and this week those fears have been keeping me from having a good nights sleep. The other weird one this week is a fear of the apartment catching on fire and me not being able to find the keys to get out the door (the whole place is barred up so the only way out is through the door, which is locked with a key from the inside). I am struggling to keep these two thoughts out of my head but bad stuff keeps drifting in and intruding on my normal sleep. I think it's because the boy is away, but I really wish I could think about other things.

Other than spiders and fire, I've also been dreaming about work, and deadlines. Pretty pathetic hey!

On that note, I really can't wait till CB is home. His mum arrives to stay with up on Sunday but he won't be home until Tuesday night. I've decided to go and stay with my parents for the weekend, being fathers day and all. I know my mum would love to come for a walk with me - I need the exercise at the moment.

Back to business: I haven't lost any weight over the last 4 weeks. I don't think I've gained any either, well not much anyway! I'm going to weigh in on Sat morning, and then have Brekky with Mary before I head up to the mountains. Mum and Dad are both watching their food intake at the moment so it shouldn't be too bad.

Anyway, I've prattled, prob too much. Enjoy the rest of the week folks.

P.S Miss Jesse - your comment has kept me smiling all afternoon. Thanks for sharing!

Weekends are bad for my thighs.

After a spectacular week of tracking, i've an an equally spectacular weekend of eating, and a bit of sulking. Proving I'm am still a hormone driven eating machine.

I had a great night on Friday - the food was delicious and I didn't eat too much but I drank like a crazy woman and paid for it saturday morning. Saturday started well - a fabulous (and I'd like to think, nutritious) breakfast with Mary on saturday morning (with my fabourite hangover remedy - a skim banana smoothie) had me pumped for a healthy couple of days - i was going to walk and eat well and all that. But then something in my head just clicked out of place and I felt like I needed to be have a full stomach. So I ate.

Funny thing is, I pigged out on my healthy foods - bread, hommous, etc etc. The worst crime was eating about 8 ww cookies. I don't know why. I made Spaghetti bolognaise on Sat night, which was yummy and we had left overs for lunch today. But I've been sneak-eating crackers and the remaining hommous and turkish bread. Just to feel full.

Now I feel more than full. I feel bloated. My monthlies arrived about 4 hours ago and are already promising me tremendous pain. I'm sulky and feeling uncomfortable.

Plus, CB turned up to dinner on Friday (YAY) to reveal he's awa y for 10 days this week. So i'm home on my own again. (BOO) I dropped him back off at the airport at 5:30. Work should keep me busy enough not to sulk too much, but I really feel lonely when he's away on the weekends. I should try and get over this pathetic-woman routine and be a strong independant girl. I can't seem to find the power in me.

I just spoke to my mum on the phone - she's also in a sad way. Her dad (my opa) got out of hospital today but doesn't remember his house. He's only been in hospital 2 weeks and his altzeimers (pardon the spelling) has taken over so quickly. So she's got a lot of pressure to look after his every need as well as try to work and run her house. I think my mum is great, I hope that she gets some relief soon.

On that note, I'm going to go, I am feeling negative and don't want to bring you all down with me.

Fun with my camera - vanity in full swing

I'm having the night off. Not working that is. I got to hand over the first part of a job last night and got approval to commence the second part but I am not even going to look at it until at least Sunday - my brain is hurting at the moment. I've spent the day trying to make annual report financial statements look good. It's a difficult task and becomes quite exhausting after a while.

Incidently, I'M ON TRACK - WOOHOO!!! I've had a great week food wise and today somehow managed to fit a Cadbury Boost bar into my allowance - they are 7 pts each!! I was shocked when I calculated it. Anyway, have still come in at 18.5 today which is under my 20pts allowance. Also, I have been trying to make sure that when I weigh in next week (4 weeks since my last weighin as LTM) I will be on par or under my last recorded weight of 65.1. And while there's no point obsessing, I did notice that my nudie weight on my dodgy scales is about 63 - which means I should be ok.

Can't wait until tomorrow night - for 2 reasons - 1) Fancy dinner and 2) CB comes home! I've missed him so much this week, and will only have him for 2 more days before he's back up to the Gold Coast for another few weeks. Sure, I've been talking to him, but it's not the same as having someone to snuggle at night. I had a shocking dream last night (nightmare sounds immature, but that's what it was!). I dreamt my room was full of wolf spiders and then I tried to wake up but didn't quite make it out of dream space which meant when I did wake up, it all felt real! I lay awake with the light on for an hour, heart pounding, then eventually fell asleep with the light on. Yukky night. I don't think about scary things when the boy is home.

Anyway, I have some chores to do tonight - cleaning, ironing etc, (plus I'm going to dye my hair if I have time), so will finish this up.

Before that though...

A few of you were curious abut my shopping trip. Well, I already had a top that was suitable, but after trying on a whole bunch of dresses and pants, I decided a simple black skirt would do the trick - here are a few photos of me after I tried on the outfit. (I had to take these myself looking the in mirror - hence the two arty farty shots - trying to compensate for the blur!)

Have a great weekend everyone. xx

time to think

Don't worry, this is not a D&M post!

I'm sitting here with a coffee and 2 ww bikkies (but they didn't last long) thinking how great it is to have a 'bit' of time to myself. Of course, I have only 12 minutes to enjoy it as I've promised myself I'll be back into the work by 8pm.

I'm nearly on top of things I think, at least for this week.

And I have something to look forward to this week - a fancy dinner on Friday night! My 'regular' client is having a dinner party and Craig and I are invited. It's just the 3 business owners, and the 2 freelancers (another girl and myself) and all our partners. I'm excited because it's at 'Wildfire' in circular quay and I've never eaten there before, but it has a spectacular view of the opera house, right on the water.

The task this week is to find something to wear! Bearing in mind, we are going there straight from work, I would like something dressy but not too flamboyant that I can't wear all day. I'm taking myself shopping on Thursday night.

Well that magical hour has ticked around, so I must keep working. Good news is that so far I've been successful in my 'on track' week - and I've planned my meals for the next 2 days already so it should stay that way.

Have a great week.

Cath

Cath + Mum

This is me (left) and my beautiful mother, Marion, in line at the city to surf a couple of weeks a go.

Just thought I'd share.

Having trouble maintaining focus

I have had a crazy fortnight and today feels like the first break I've had to relax a little bit. The reason for the craziness - I have taken on an extra client to 'fill' two spare days. That's all cool except that I also won an 'on the side' job at the same time, which meant I've been trying to fit 8 days work into 5. This has become quite exhausting. I'm not complaining - it's great to have more $$, but it has certainly taken it's toll on my body - and mind.

Mostly the latter, I feel like I'm out of control again, unable to take charge of my eating and indulge in my healthy habits. Instead I've been eating on the run, compromising what I want for 'anything that will stop my headache and stomach rumbling' and then binging on naughty stuff at night. I've eaten practically a whole pack of family assorted biscuits this week! I feel like I've been a bit reckless and rebellious the last fortnight and my body is actually hurting for it.

Not much I can do now - but I do want to try to undo the damage this week. I went for a great walk today - down to the rocks and around circular quay then all the way back up to Broadway where I had parked my car. I needed think time. I used to do this walk every weekend, now I'm lucky to do it once every 3 or four months. Doing the city to surf the weekend before last (took me and mum 148 mins to finish the 14kms) made me realise that I should try and find the time again.

CB is away all week. I dropped him off at the airport at 5 and he's just txt me to say he's arrived and picked up the car etc. I still feel a bit vulnerable in the house on my own at night, but I find I get a lot more done when he isn't home. I also eat better.

After I dropped him off , I went to the supermarket and bought a whole bunch of healthy dinner and lunch type food. I also bought some girly pick-me-ups: New razor blades, face cleanser and hair dye. We have a special dinner to go to this Friday night and I plan on being a new woman by then!!

Well that's my little bit for today. I don't know if I'll get a chance to blog again this week, but hope everyone else is well and staying healthy!

AWOL

Hi Kids,

This is just a quicky as I'm drowning in client work at the moment.

I have officially 'bitten off more than I can chew'. I will be back when I'm done choking!

I miss you all. I can't wait to catch up on all the bloggy goss.

Stay happy, healthy, and wonderful.

Cath

Two week cycles

I went back to my meeting today, desperately hoping to re-affirm my "life-time-member-at-goal" status and surprised myself by the results on the scales. I am down 2.4 kgs from my 'nasty' weigh-in 2 weeks ago! My weight-loss pattern seems to show a weight reduction occurring every second week, and in between I either gain or maintain. Anyone else experience this?

anyway, needless to say, being busy with work probably contributed to this loss, and I dare say my big night out dancing last night might have a tincy bit to do with it as well. But who cares. 65.1kg !! I'm wrapped! And now only 1.6kg to go to get back to my personal goal. I can do this. Heck, we all can! It's working woohoo!!

I caught up with Mary again today, god that girl looks good!! Fit an healthy and in proportion - Well done on your results today too Mary, You have worked so hard. (Hope you don't mind my observations being posted here, but I'm excited for you!!)

Anyway, I'm off to celebrate my good mood and buy something new to wear.