I'm baaaaack!

Nothing notable to add unfortunately, so I'll start with where I'm at right now.

Work:
Right this second I'm supposed to be doing what will hopefully be my last ever BAS statement (and looking to be my first ever BAS fine as I'm way overdue in submitting it). I'm putting my ambitions of being a woman in business aside for a while as I feel I have found something in my job that satisfies the creative urges I have without taking away my need to be in control of my life. All sounds a bit cryptic, but it's not meant to. I have simply found a job I love. A rare thing in this world, but I feel like a valid entity again and it's wonderful. I am going to keep my little business on ice for a while, and maybe bring it back to life later on.

Life:
Is OK. I've recently had an emotional blow to the heart which has left me gutted and I trying to move on, but I'm not there yet. My primary focus is moving forward and learning to overcome unfounded suspicion so I can get on with my life. I want to start giving 100% again, and I can't do that until I accept that I am not in control of everything. Some stuff has gone down, but I can't keep holding on to negativity that I felt the moment it all sunk in. Again, I'm being a bit sketchy on the details (necessary in this medium I feel) but basically, my self-esteem and confidence has taken a pounding.

I have taken advantage of the counselling service at work and seen someone who didn't offer me much in the way of a solution, but he gave me a few tools to help turn negative feelings around. It's been quite helpful and I am feeling a lot better than I was.

Health:
Not so great I'm afraid. Too much of the good life (wine, food, sleeping in) has left me back at the start line again. Weighing the same as I did when I first started this journal a few years back. I'm not happy about that, I'm also feeling unfit and less confident in my ability to make the changes. Right this second I am sooo hungry after finishing day 2 of the light an easy menu. (I had a false start with Lite and easy about 9 months ago, but am trying again). I've been doing a lot of calorie-king counting, which is great, but have been lazy with my cooking when I get home. While I'm really busy, I'm hoping 4 weeks of lite and easy will kick-start my healthy routines.

I've also got a sore hip/thigh/knee issue on my left side which is causing me a lot of discomfort. I went to the Dr about it last week and have been x-rayed etc, but still have no solution. I will go back next week for a followup.

Anyway, that's about where I'm sitting now. I should go do that BAS & I should try for an early night.